Erika's Journal: Was This A Mistake?

Erika's Journal

Erika McWilliams | Journal Entry: #3

I was so exhausted after the party, I saw Sarah out and went straight to bed. When I awoke the next morning I decided to try on some new clothes that I had bought for the party, but didn't end up wearing. They were a different style to what I was used to, it doesn't hurt to mix things up.
As I left my bedroom my good mood quickly subsided as I saw the mess that was left from last night. Thankful that I had awoken early, I got my arse into gear and started cleaning, two full sweeps of the house later and you wouldn't have known that this house was full of people last night.
The work week passed by, I caught up with patients while the doctor was running late, kept up with my medical studies, and watched the medical receptionist fail at his job of admitting patients.
On Friday my supervisor called me into their office. While waiting for test results for a patient she sat me down, "Erika, you have shown initiative and perseverance in your role during the last two weeks. My fellow doctor's and I have discussed this, and we think you should be moved up into the role of an Orderly."
I couldn't do anything but smile, "Thank you! I, I don't know what else to say, oh, thank you!"
My supervisor laughed, "Erika, nothing else needs to be said. Keep up your great work and you will get far, now, let's find out what these test results say for our patient here."
While watering the plants that afternoon I couldn't stop thinking of my promotion. I had gotten recognition for my work, is this what it feels like to be treated as an equal? Enjoying the cool breeze, in the eternal summer that is Oasis Springs, I lost track of time while gardening, until I was reminded by my stomach rumbling.

As I began to brush the dirt off my clothes the phone rang, without looking at the caller ID I answered, "Hello, Erika speaking."
I instantly recognised the voice that replied, "Hi Erika, it's Pierre, I'm going out to the local pub tonight and was wondering if you would like to come along?"
My day was going well, I didn't know whether to risk it again with Pierre after last time. Maybe if I kept it to just talking and didn't allow it to go further, it would be a good night out.
"Well? Are you still there Erika?" Pierre asked, obviously getting annoyed at my lack of reply.
As I replied I tried to make it sound cheerful, though it took a bit to get there, "Ah, yea, sure. As long as I can get a feed while there as I am starving."
"It's a pub, of course they have food! See you there in 30!" With this, Pierre hung up.
I cleaned up and headed straight there, as it was a good 30 minute drive to get there. Despite Pierre's claims the bar only served chips and the pub didn't have a kitchen, so I cooked up some stuffed potatoes for dinner to end the continuous rumbling. Pierre headed straight to the bar to get a drink, though he was still up there by the time I finished my meal. From my observations he was chatting up the three ladies at the bar, despite inviting me out to spend time with him.

Upset I stood up to go speak to him, as I gathered my plate to bring it to the bar Pierre interrupted me, "Erika my sweet, how are you today my lovely?"
As he put his hand on my shoulder I melted at his touch, I hated myself for feeling for him after our last encounter. Despite my best efforts the tone of my voice followed suit, "I, I am quite good today Pierre."
Pierre smiled, and with that sweet look he has, pulled me in for a kiss. Feeling stupidly giddy I moved to give him my cheek, his touch against my skin drove me wild and I hated it. I didn't want to feel this for someone who used me for a one night stand, and spends a night out with one lady chatting up others, I couldn't go through this pain again.
Pierre sat me down on the couch with him and bought me a drink, a few drinks and many laughs later I, well, I pashed Pierre.
Everyone in the pub was cheering for me, though I couldn't believe what I had just done. While Pierre was still in a smiley daze I left. I had gotten so caught up in the moment I had gone against my better judgement. Was it the alcohol? Or was it the overwhelming feeling I had for him that I couldn't shake? Does this make us a "thing" now? Why did I do it?
I don't know if I'm ready for a relationship, especially with the bumpy road that may lie ahead to avoid heart break. Do I even have room for a relationship in my life at the moment?

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